I can not walk well, but I can do yoga ....

The crutches fit all too comforably , nestling into my armpits . Familiar . Almost like an old friend .

But not really .

Am I here again ? What is the message ? Have I not " done the work?"

Some people say I am doing too much , Some say I am being too cautious ....etc etc stories upon stories of hip replacements , most -- " Oh piece of cake ! it is great ! " some others say many months , still others just shake their heads .

message there : listen to your own self. reach out for help, seek professinal and medical advice, and certainly become more knowledgeable about your condition/ health/ state of being/ circumstances. go back to your knowing slef . surrender , learn . deep understanding and awarenesses come.

ok did that . have been humbled, honored by support . allowing .

and recoevry slow, according to some frame of reference I had created , but perfect !

and then , in the midst of a day in the life .... I pick up a boiling pot of water off the stove and it slips from my hands splashing down my leg and onto my sneaker , and through my pants amd sneaker .........

I drop the pot and begin a wild dance of shedding the clothes and shoes and jumpng into the tub- turning on the lukewarmish / cool water on to meet the firey scalding foot.

Oh! hahah my hip did not hurt at all during that !

Fast Forward to to 2 weeks - last night - Full Moon , teaching gentle yoga . walking in on crutches . I had perhaps walked too much , favored my foot too much, left hip in deep pain , burns stil raw. and most concerning - my right hip -" the bionic one" is wonky.

But I show up . Not because I have to , but because I feel healed at Masjah. Safe. Higher vibes supportng you . . Sanctuary .. and all the amazing people that come to classes . Tribe.

Half way through the class, as we breathed together , moved into our strengths, and surrendered into the spaces of letting go , I was reminded of the message of balance . balancing the rest with the active particapation in our healing process . I was embraced by the experience rather that trying to search for the message .

I lsiened to my inner knowing , as ideas and advices from others - all wonderful and spot on indeed - were replaced with the sensations of trust in the Mystery.

the full moon was so so amazing . I did finally go out and create a sacred fire . finally . I hada a whole bag of items and papers , wishes and things to release .. prayers and symbols ,

that I had not fired up . so i did ! Gratitude , Blessings . I took my eversouce bill envelope , which symbolized some roubles i have been having with them , and other bills and docs . and drew big hearts on them , and thanked the moon, the mystery, the divine , and danced . as best i could. barefeet. burn and all . cold earth felt good .

smoke signals of prayer to the heavens.

today, when I woke up i still required crutches , and cried . Ahhh crying is good . water flow to match the fire medicine. I had recieved great healing - I had asked, and now must believe , and act accordingly . not easy ,in this time when everything is up for everyone . our stuff may be different , but we are all learning . evolving.

We must see with clear vision and trust . we must be informed , be able to discern , be prepared to see our follies and acknowledge the trickster in us . Especially when we see ourselves defending a postion, or becoming frustrated when others do not see it our way , or get so charged and angry .

"We are being asked , to recall differences bewteen our true authentic selves , our true needs , and material & emotional crutches" ~pathfinder

message recieved !

~ happy and safe travels on this journey dance of life ~